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Sunday, May 10, 2020

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CUISINE BOWL SHAMING NUTRITIONIST IMPROV RANT

BBC

If you think of your food in this terminology, as PROTEIN plus other shit in a BOWL of God knows what thrown together, a POSTMODERN FUSION MESS of multicultural shit, as a fricking protein, you neither need, nor deserve, any meat, poultry, dairy, or fish; and if I controlled things, you would not get a sliver  of anything but something like bean curd, or other gray vegan vegetable solid, boiled soy beans, vestigial sprouts, stuff like that, peanuts, etc. 

Your hard sliver of protein would taste more or less like dry cat shit, and you would cut its rock solid consistency, to make it barely palatable, with Asian "vegetables", crunchy nothings water chestnuts, baby pathetic faux corn, stringy tough bok fricking choy, Chinese and soupy or sticky ricey starches of all kinds, soybean burnt fried wonton noodles, spring roll filled with the above fake veg and browned in heavily reused peanut canola and soy oil, an abundance of soy legumes on the side, and a terrible foul smelling, rotting, salty, buried, pickled fish shell, skin, and bones sauce dilution (no real liquefied fish flesh even in there!).

How much protein do you all need? 

Trust me, not much, with that cornucopia!

Postscript:
Guess what else: On this diet, you can still weigh 400 pounds.
How: Just eat a whole lot of it!

What happens if you go too far?
You will need deprogramming:

Image result for duckboy cards reprogramming a vegetarian


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