MARIO SAVIO VOXIO'S CALISIPPIANS

SNL THE CALIFORNIANS WILDFIRE DIALOGUE

Stuart: Sheriff jus called. We lost her!
Devin: Hoaw, Sturt, haow?
Stuart: Took a rong tuurn!
Devin: Goin for mayonnaise!

 THE MISSIPPIANS

Sae, iz Horthie still razin howgs?
Yeah, butt hez not too gud atit! Whan anuthr one dies, he hasuh barbeque.
Yu know, Horthys slow....He wuz dropt on is haed.  Deer eat mostu his corn in th feel....
Mebee thas wye he awlwaez has venasun whin i go by thare.
Heel sheuwot cuuck n eat enuthang that movs, doun thair inat hollah!
Leest hes naut uh queah, lik is naybuh! Yu no, that ol boih wut razez pefaow! 
Thay strutin un poopin all ovr is plaice! Thas wun wird ol burd!

CALIFORNIANS

Stewart: Wi'r u warin uh kilt, Devin?
Devin: Thay sey its coulur, fur th crowin jowls.
Stewart: Ware yu groin?
Devin: Gotta git sommor cold fruit salud!
Stewart: Don ask me howtu git thar. Fires everwheare!
Devin: Iwon, asshole!
Stewart: Ben ice no win ya.

MISSIPPIANS

Wuzdat?
Possm steuw.
I thot u tol me itwuz sqirl!  Kudn yu getusa fat sqirl?
I traydedat fur sum wiskie!
Lees is not uh amohdilow. Am taard o amohdilow!
Am taard o sokin um ol day long!
See if yu kin git a skunk tmorowah.

The Californians:

(Gavin, kissing Afrk's butt.)
Sturt: Gavin, watr u dun hr?
Gavin: Cum t fix ur puul sown cystern!
Strt: Goutuhir, Gavin!
Gavin: Tanks Sturt!

THE MISSIPPIANS

Yu uh mulatto!
Soa ah yuw, yu rascl!
Weah yo peepl frum? 
Gabon, day say.
Whoa! Mine frum duh Congo!
Dey nslavd owuh asses!
Yu diservd it, bich!

THE CALIFORNIANS

Stuart (gender undetermined): Why'd yu tell im dat, Devin?
He's gonna be fried ur boild!
Devin: I culdn't hep it, Stewwart!
Stuart: Ok Devin, yur reeeetardardedd!
Devin: I kno I no. Humeans kno win dey retroarded.